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Dear B

Dear B,

The memories you have given me has changed my life forever. So many beautiful memories that I can cherish each and every day. Memories I can look back on and appreciate with gratitude. The opportunities you have given me, the people I have met, have helped mold me into the man I am today. The lessons I’ve learned, both humbling and rewarding, wouldn’t have been possible without you. I owe so much to you, I wouldn’t possibly know where to begin.

However, with all the blessings you have given me, they didn’t come without their shortcomings. Before you blessed me with your presence, I failed to reach you. Over and over and over again. I had given you everything I had and it wasn’t good enough for you. I kept trying, and I kept failing. As time passed, you had finally accepted me with open arms.

Once I finally reached you, I never wanted to lose you. I worked to be as well rounded as I possibly could. Not for me, but for you. I knew that all the blood, sweat and tears I poured in, would all be worth it. Day after day, I worked tirelessly to get closer to where I felt I needed to be, for you.

While I was trying to be better, I lost you. Again and again I lost you. I tried to be with you. I tried to STAY with you, but it felt like no matter what I had done, sooner or later, I had lost you again.

As I sit here now, I have lost you again. This time I wonder if I can truly get back to you. I have spent so much time and effort into getting back to you, I wonder if I can do it again. In my heart I know I can, but my mind is not so sure.

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